So its been several months and I'm sure I will forget things that have happened or emotions and feelings that were felt. But I promise I will give it my best shot. My last post was the first day Alec walked with his prosethic, what a crazy emotional day that was! So much has happened and then really nothing out of the ordinary all at the same time. Its hard to know what to share and what people find boring or uninteresting, but then again this is real life and not always about what you want to hear, right?
Around the end of February our really awesome friend held another fundraiser for Alec and the turn out was amazing as always! Thank you so much Larry Benson for all your hard work and help! and thank you so much for everyone that came it was awesome!
In March we went back to see Dr Maack, (one of our favorite Docs). We were so stressed about having yet another surgery to fix Alecs ACL. At the same time I was informed by my landlord that I would have to move. The stress of trying to pack< find a good place for my family, pack and try and take care of Alec was very overwhelming to me. Again it was a tender mercy from the lord! We went to see Dr Maack and we were all so happy to know that Alec wouldn't have to have surgery at this time. His knee seemed pretty stable and Dr Maack felt very good about leaving it at least for now. I was so relieved, all the other stresses were getting to me, but mostly the thought of Alec going under again and basically having to start all over on his recovery and walking were just more than I thought either of us could do. Although as usual, Alec went in with an amazing attitude and would have done it without complaining!
On April 9th, Alecs good friend Andrew (Red) came home from his mission, I can honestly tell you that as a mom, my heart was so filled with joy and happiness when Andrew came down that escalator and picked Alec up and they both hugged and cried. I had many days where I thought Alec wouldn't make it to see Andrew and it was truly a highlight of my life.
At the end of April Brontay graduated from BYU and we all went and watched her walk in her graduation ceremony. So proud of her!! Was truly a bitter sweet day however, because that meant she would be going home to Houston and none of us were sure how either of them were going to handle being apart. These two kids have been through so much together and have relied so heavily on each other that it was scary for all of us, and Im sure for them even more so!
The first part of May Alec was on KUTV news with Chris Wingert from REAL and they did an interview together. It was impressive to watch him and Chris and how their relationship has changed from very casusal to a true friendship! Chris has truly been an angel for Alec and has gone way above and beyond! Thank you Chris, words can never express our gratitude.
These are the basics....now for the other stuff.....
So as far as Alec, honestly I have continually been amazed by him! That being said, Oh my hell this is the hardest thing I have ever been through! It is beyond describable.... He never complains and never says why me, but I know there have to be really hard days and he has hard times. While Brontay was gone (shes back now for a month, wahoo) he struggled with a lot of things, being lonely for her Im sure at the top of that list! He didn't want to do anything really and just didn't feel very good. He gets super tired very easy....they have told us that this is normal, because of the amount of energy it takes to walk, but is still so hard.
Alec finally started to show some spark when he talked about going to Country Jam with Brian which was coming up. He was looking SO forward to that! I was worried and kept saying to him, "are you sure you can do this, its a lot and you are still recovering"? He kept assuring me he could and that he was fine. Brian and I talked and I asked him to please make sure he was alright, which of course he was already all over and making things as easy as he could for Alec. What an awesome friend! Alec left on Wed and Fri morning I text him and said so hows it goin....The text back was NOT what I expected and broke my heart. "Its just too much, can you come get me? Literally, my heart sank! I was completely heart broken that the thing that he had been SO looking forward to was just more than his tired body could handle. I of course got in the car and drove to Grand Junction to get him. I am pretty sure I cried all the way there! I know he wants to do all the things he did before and in his head he thinks he can, but his body is just not healed yet. I don't think until that moment that even Alec realized the toll his entire body went through. I know he will get there, but it is going to take time. It was way more than just his leg, lungs kidneys spleen heart....you name it, it was beat up! The reality of his situation was extremely evident to him in that moment and it broke my heart!
We have had a few things here and there that are scary for me, and honestly although he would never admit it, I think scary for him as well. They turned out to not be big deals (comparably) and Im sure there will be more. It is the most frightening thing to not know how to help or fix things for him. and all at the same time try and let him learn and deal on his own. He is the strongest person I know! I know he wants to do everything like before, and I know he will do all those things, it just doesn't come quick enough for him! The financial burden for a 21 year old is also difficult to not be able to fix! He needs things for his leg, a knee, ankle, different kind of foot ect and all of those things cost a lot of money and he has had to learn to wait on those. He will get there, WE will get there! I never thought my child would have to learn to re walk, run, wake board, snow board, drive, (I could go on and on) all over again at the age of 21. But this I can tell you.....I am beyond grateful and blessed that he is still alive to re learn all of those things! As hard as this is, and there are a lot of days that I simply cant do one thing but sit down and cry. There are more days that I am so happy that he is alive and getting better every single day! He and Brontay have a saying "We are grateful in our circumstance", WOW, if that is not a lesson for all of us!
I will truly try to update more frequently, I just kind of thought....the trauma is over (for everyone else) so they don't want to hear about it. However I am again amazed by the out pouring of love and concern and the amount of people that have asked me why Im not updating. Thank you seems again so inadequate but its truly from the depths of my soul!