Saturday, June 28, 2014

The New Normal

So I've had several people tell me I need to update the blog so here I go.....before I start let me say two things, first it will be long as there is a lot of info in the past few months. second, this is a mothers point of view, wether its all perfect or how Alec would tell it, I don't know for sure but its my point of view as his mom.
So its been several months and I'm sure I will forget things that have happened or emotions and feelings that were felt. But I promise I will give it my best shot. My last post was the first day Alec walked with his prosethic, what a crazy emotional day that was! So much has happened and then really nothing out of the ordinary all at the same time. Its hard to know what to share and what people find boring or uninteresting, but then again this is real life and not always about what you want to hear, right?
Around the end of February our really awesome friend held another fundraiser for Alec and the turn out was amazing as always! Thank you so much Larry Benson for all your hard work and help! and thank you so much for everyone that came it was awesome!
In March we went back to see Dr Maack, (one of our favorite Docs). We were so stressed about having yet another surgery to fix Alecs ACL. At the same time I was informed by my landlord that I would have to move. The stress of trying to pack< find a good place for my family, pack and try and take care of Alec was very overwhelming to me. Again it was a tender mercy from the lord! We went to see Dr Maack and we were all so happy to know that Alec wouldn't have to have surgery at this time. His knee seemed pretty stable and Dr Maack felt very good about leaving it at least for now. I was so relieved, all the other stresses were getting to me, but mostly the thought of Alec going under again and basically having to start all over on his recovery and walking were just more than I thought either of us could do.  Although as usual, Alec went in with an amazing attitude and would have done it without complaining!
On April 9th, Alecs good friend Andrew (Red) came home from his mission, I can honestly tell you that as a mom, my heart was so filled with joy and happiness when Andrew came down that escalator and picked Alec up and they both hugged and cried. I had many days where I thought Alec wouldn't make it to see Andrew and it was truly a highlight of my life.
At the end of April Brontay graduated from BYU and we all went and watched her walk in her graduation ceremony. So proud of her!! Was truly a bitter sweet day however, because that meant she would be going home to Houston and none of us were sure how either of them were going to handle being apart. These two kids have been through so much together and have relied so heavily on each other that it was scary for all of us, and Im sure for them even more so!
The first part of May Alec was on KUTV news with Chris Wingert from REAL and they did an interview together. It was impressive to watch him and Chris and how their relationship has changed from very casusal to a true friendship! Chris has truly been an angel for Alec and has gone way above and beyond! Thank you Chris, words can never express our gratitude.
These are the for the other stuff.....
So as far as Alec, honestly I have continually been amazed by him! That being said, Oh my hell this is the hardest thing I have ever been through! It is beyond describable.... He never complains and never says why me, but I know there have to be really hard days and he has hard times. While Brontay was gone (shes back now for a month, wahoo) he struggled with a lot of things, being lonely for her Im sure at the top of that list! He didn't want to do anything really and just didn't feel very good. He gets super tired very easy....they have told us that this is normal, because of the amount of energy it takes to walk, but is still so hard.
Alec finally started to show some spark when he talked about going to Country Jam with Brian which was coming up. He was looking SO forward to that! I was worried and kept saying to him, "are you sure you can do this, its a lot and you are still recovering"? He kept assuring me he could and that he was fine. Brian and I talked and I asked him to please make sure he was alright, which of course he was already all over and making things as easy as he could for Alec. What an awesome friend! Alec left on Wed and Fri morning I text him and said so hows it goin....The text back was NOT what I expected and broke my heart. "Its just too much, can you come get me? Literally, my heart sank! I was completely heart broken that the thing that he had been SO looking forward to was just more than his tired body could handle. I of course got in the car and drove to Grand Junction to get him. I am pretty sure I cried all the way there! I know he wants to do all the things he did before and in his head he thinks he can, but his body is just not healed yet. I don't think until that moment that even Alec realized the toll his entire body went through. I know he will get there, but it is going to take time. It was way more than just his leg, lungs kidneys spleen name it, it was beat up! The reality of his situation was extremely evident to him in that moment and it broke my heart!
We have had a few things here and there that are scary for me, and honestly although he would never admit it, I think scary for him as well. They turned out to not be big deals (comparably) and Im sure there will be more. It is the most frightening thing to not know how to help or fix things for him. and all at the same time try and let him learn and deal on his own. He is the strongest person I know! I know he wants to do everything like before, and I know he will do all those things, it just doesn't come quick enough for him! The financial burden for a 21 year old is also difficult to not be able to fix! He needs things for his leg, a knee, ankle, different kind of foot ect and all of those things cost a lot of money and he has had to learn to wait on those. He will get there, WE will get there! I never thought  my child would have to learn to re walk, run, wake board, snow board, drive, (I could go on and on) all over again at the age of 21. But this I can tell you.....I am beyond grateful and blessed that he is still alive to re learn all of those things! As hard as this is, and there are a lot of days that I simply cant do one thing but sit down and cry. There are more days that I am so happy that he is alive and getting better every single day! He and Brontay have a saying "We are grateful in our circumstance", WOW, if that is not a lesson for all of us!
I will truly try to update more frequently, I just kind of thought....the trauma is over (for everyone else) so they don't want to hear about it. However I am again amazed by the out pouring of love and concern and the amount of people that have asked me why Im not updating. Thank you seems again so inadequate but its truly from the depths of my soul!

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Im filled with so many emotions today! I have NEVER been more proud of Alec than I am today! At the same time as a mother have never felt so completely helpless! Watching my son learn to walk again is the most amazing thing. He just stood right there and walked!!! My heart is so completely full; I cannot put into words all the feelings. As parents we are supposed to protect our children and help them. In this situation we have had no control and cannot fix this! While Alec is continually positive and moving forward as his parents all we can do is watch and support. I wish more than ever that I could trade him places or go back and change time. I don't know how to do this!!! My heart is filled with more pride than I have ever had for Alec. At the same time, so much hurt for the things he will have to go through that should be easy and will never be easy again! I know Alec has such a great purpose to fulfill here and I have NO doubt that he will! He has the most courage, strength and determination of anyone I have ever known! I know that he will accomplish all of his goals and will continue to be an inspiration to so many people. I feel truly blessed to be able to witness all of the things that he will do.
Thank you for the continued love, support, and prayers, lord knows we need them!! Much love to each and every one of you!!

It's been quite awhile since I updated the blog. Im just trying to find a new normal. Alec is doing amazing and is still extremely positive. He really wants to get going with his life and we are hopeful that this week he may get his first leg so he can start learning to walk again. He has gained a little weight; he's all the way back up to 150lbs! Woohoo!
We went back to the cardiologist this past week and they are going to do a cat scan on his heart to make sure everything is okay. He has had some chest pain and sharp stabbing pains so we are hopeful it's still just his body recovering.
Alec has designed some t-shirts to help raise some money for his leg, they are pretty awesome! Chris Wingert from Real Salt Lake is helping Alec so much and is going to be doing an auction of stuff from players to help as well. It is AMAZING the amount of support Alec has received from Chris!
Alec gets tired super easy and hus body is still weak. But his body gets stronger everyday and lord knows NOTHING is going to keep this kid down! We are all so beyond blessed to have him still with us! It literally becomes more clear everyday that this guy has some serious work to do!
We are so grateful for the love and support we have had and can't put into words what it has meant for us!
A few nights ago, Alec was on Channel 4 with Chris Wingert. If you didn't see it, go on Alec's Facebook page and follow the link and watch it. He is continually my inspiration! Hopefully this week we will be updating this blog with pictures of him WALKING!! Keep the prayers coming he and we need them and can feel them! Thanks again and we love each and every one of you!

Sunday, January 5, 2014

It's been quite a while since I updated, so I thought I better get on it! Alec has had a good week or so... he was able to get the pins out of his hand so that was great! After he got them out, he went straight to his friend Brian's to play xbox! I didn't think his thumb would work quite well enough for that, but as usual he proved me wrong!  He has more determination than anyone I know.
He went to Park City to meet the rest of Brontay's family on New Year's Eve and that went really well! He loves them all and seemed to be accepted in return.

Real life is a challenge for both Alec and Brontay. Alec relearning to walk, drive, and just live, and Brontay learning to live with diabetes and adjust to that. It seems overwhelming to me just thinking about it, but they both just take it in stride. I'm so proud of them! Alec is really the most frustrated at this point about all the weight loss. He is pretty thin, but it will come back, and he will start rebuilding muscle. He won't use his wheelchair AT ALL now and is determined to use the crutches for everything. He has fallen a few times, but just gets right back up and moves ahead. He decided today that he was ready to go back home. I know he can do it, it just scares me to not have him here where I can help. He feels like he needs to push himself to move forward and part of that is learning to live on his own again and do things for himself. I made him promise he will always answer phone calls and will not be stubborn if it's just too much.
Today he was also able to baptize his little sister Kennedy. He was supposed to do that 3 days after the accident happened and she wanted to wait until he could. It was a pretty awesome experience! His brother Landon held him while he held Kennedy. It went really great! I love my son and am so beyond proud of him! Please keep praying, we need them! Love you all!

Friday, December 20, 2013

What a HUGE day and week! We were so blessed by 97.1 zht coming to our house and doing secret Santa for my kids! It was AMAZING! We are so beyond blessed to have such awesome giving people around us!
Then today, well today has been a day alright! We went to see Dr. Maack this morning and everything in Alec's left leg looks good. He can start using crutches! 8 weeks and one day following this accident my son stood up! I'll get back to that....
then we went straight to get Alec's haircut! That's right, the Tim Riggins or Sunshine hair is no longer! Now those of you who know Alec, know what a big deal that truly is. All I can say is he REALLY loves Brontay!
Then tonight Alec took his first step! It was absolutely amazing and heart wrenching at the same time. I can honestly say it is one of the hardest things I've had to watch. He was pretty wobbly and I kept trying to make sure he didn't fall. He said, "Mom, I'm going to fall! Its gonna happen and you have to let me fall, that's the only way I will learn to walk again!" Are you kidding me? What an incredible man he is! I cannot believe his wisdom and strength! UNBELIEVABLE! What a long journey we have ahead, but how blessed we are to witness such courage and strength. Thank you for all your love support and prayers, we feel it everyday!

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Such an awesome experience with the prosthetic doctors this morning! Alec is doing so well that they are going to start fitting him for a prosthetic in the next couple of weeks!!! Can you even believe that?
We meet with Dr. Maack  on Thursday and if Alec can start bearing weight on his left leg, they can start those fittings, and get him up and learning with a prosethic in the next couple of weeks! I am completely overwhelmed and excited for him!
It is going to be a long process and will take months to get him a correct prosthetic, but the fact that he could be up standing in the next few weeks is SO AWESOME!!! We were not expecting it to be this soon! But as usual, he continues to defy the odds and is amazing and strong! I know that prayer works and that every single one of you has made this all happen.....that along with his awesome attitude and motivation! Pray for continued good news on Thursday so he can get moving! Love you all and THANK YOU!!!!!

Sunday, December 15, 2013

This is a post directly from Alec that was on Facebook: I had a great time watching the Utes smash the Y tonight. I know that most of the people I owe my life to wont see this post, but I am so thankful to this school and the hospital. All the athletics here have been amazing in coming and supporting me while I was in the hospital, and giving me special treatment out of it. I really want to express my gratitude to all the doctors, surgeons, nurses, and aids that saved my life. As I have many appointments with these men and women, I find I am excited and can't wait to see them. I am beyond lucky to be alive. I want to say thank you so much. I could never repay you for all that you've done for me. I have absolutely nothing to complain about, and I won't complain. I will just take advantage of this second chance on life.